Lately, it feels like every week I hear another story about layoffs. Whether it’s in the news, from a friend, or through another woman in my network, someone somewhere is navigating some sort of change.
That’s part of why I wanted to share my story. My own layoff last year was unexpected and, at the time, deeply personal. It wasn’t just about losing a job; it was about losing a piece of my identity and slowly, intentionally, finding myself again.
Now, a year later, I’ve had time to reflect and heal. I’ve also realized just how common these experiences are and how, as women, we often put extra pressure on ourselves to prove we’re capable, to stay strong, and to somehow balance it all. That’s why talking about it matters. Too many of us walk through these moments quietly and alone, believing we’re the only ones. We’re not. When we share our stories, we give each other permission to breathe, reset, and keep going. There’s power in knowing we don’t have to go it all alone.
That’s why I decided to write them down and share the lessons that helped me the most after my layoff. Maybe they can offer hope or encouragement to another woman who’s navigating her own transition.
Lesson One: It’s OK to not be OK.
When the layoff happened, everyone told me, “It’s business, not personal.” But it felt personal. I questioned my worth and identity — and had to remind myself my value didn’t change just because my job did.
I’ve learned that healing doesn’t follow a timeline. You don’t have to bounce back right away. You’re allowed to sit with the messy emotions. You’re allowed to rest. You’re allowed to take your time.
Lesson Two: Quiet the Noise in Your Head
For me, the negative self-talk came fast. Was I not good enough? What did I do wrong? Should I have seen this coming? That kind of head trash kicks in fast — especially for women. We replay every detail, take on blame that isn’t ours, and convince ourselves we’re not enough.
The turning point came when I stopped asking, Why me? and started saying, What’s next. That didn’t happen overnight, and I wish I’d quieted the noise in my head sooner. But learning to change the story I was telling myself made all the difference.
Lesson Three: The people who show up matter most.
One of the biggest surprises wasn’t the layoff itself, but the kindness that followed. People I barely knew reached out with words of encouragement, connections, or just a simple check-in.
That generosity stayed with me. It reminded me that titles fade, jobs change, but relationships last. And sometimes, the people you least expect are the ones who show up when you need them most. That lesson has made me more intentional about showing up for others, because now I truly understand how much it matters.
Lesson Four: Pause Before You Panic
When the layoff happened, my instinct was to move fast. Update the resume. Schedule coffee meetings. Apply to jobs. Be productive.
But looking back, I wish I’d given myself permission to rest first. To step back, reflect, and breathe. Those quiet moments became the space where clarity finally showed up.
Sometimes, slowing down is what allows you to see what you want most, instead of rushing into the first thing that comes next.
Lesson Five: You get to define your own path.
A year later, I’m not where I thought I’d be, and that’s turned out to be a gift. I’ve relaunched my PR business, Baise Collective, and I’m continuing to tell stories through my podcast, Badassery Life. I’m doing work that matters to me, in a way that feels calmer, healthier, and more aligned with my values.
I’m building something that reflects my vision while partnering with others on theirs. I’m creating opportunities, amplifying voices, and helping share the stories that deserve to be heard. And the best part? I get to choose how this next chapter unfolds.
At the end of the day, no job title or company defines me. I do.
Lesson Six: Community Heals More Than You Think
Over the past year, I’ve been surprised by how many of us are navigating similar transitions, whether it’s a layoff, a career shift, or an unexpected life change. Talking about my own layoff showed me just how much we need each other – not just for advice or opportunities, but for strength. There’s something powerful about hearing another woman say, ‘I’ve been there too.’ It reminds us we’re part of something bigger.
We’re not meant to do this alone. When we share our stories, listen to one another, and show up for each other, the weight feels lighter, and the path forward a little less lonely.
One Year Later
A year later, the hurt hasn’t completely disappeared, but the lessons have softened the edges. I’ve learned to let go of old definitions of success, lean on others when I need to, and give myself grace when life doesn’t go as planned.
If you’re in the middle of a layoff or navigating any big transition, I hope you know this: you are not alone, and your story isn’t over. These moments don’t define us; they shape us. They’re just chapters, and the next one is yours to write. And sometimes, the best part of the story is discovering that what comes next can be even better than you imagined.
Kelly Young is the founder of Baise Collective and host of the Badassery Life podcast, where she amplifies the voices and stories of inspiring women. Follow her on Instagram @baisecollective and @kryoungindy.
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